Souring Sweetness

Well now Jeff Pearlman has gone and done it. He’s sullied the pristine image of a Chicago sports legend, possibly the greatest player in NFL history.

No one seemed to mind when he was the author of a revealing article in Sports Illustrated about John Rocker. Everyone hated Rocker and thought Pearlman had a lot of guts to report it.

When you ignore all the facts and don’t report all sides of the story you are doing a disservice to your subject and insulting the public who will be reading your work. It’s the same as going to a sporting event your child is involved in and telling them they were the best out of everyone on the field while completely ignoring the six errors or own goal or personal foul or whatever. There is nothing wrong with praising (which Pearlman did for over 400 pages) while tactfully pointing out the mistakes (which Pearlman did for 20 pages). If we are to believe Pearlman, that he set out to write a biography on Payton, then it is journalistic responsibility to write what he learns. How he chooses to represent that information, embellish or not, will determine whether he did a hack job or was an honest reporter.

Mike Ditka did not take kindly to the excerpt that was released in SI. Ditka’s reaction was typical in many ways. He was defending a player he loved and respected. He over-reacted in his reaction like he always did as a head coach. And he offered a threat (spitting on Pearlman) which while childish and idiotic can also be emblematic of Ditka .

I have read the SI excerpt. I have not read the entire book simply because I don’t have the book. Is it disturbing to read that one of our icons, our heroes was flawed? Sure, especially Walter since he seemed so perfect. But there’s nothing wrong with someone deciding to write a complete biography and then doing just that. If Pearlman wanted to make it salacious, I suspect the pages ratio (400:20) would have been reversed. While everyone wants to go after Pearlman, let’s keep in mind he didn’t make up the quotes. People who worked with Payton for years and years and years provided the information that has become so igniting. Why is it the public and media isn’t calling for the heads of Payton’s former personal aide, lawyer and financial representative?

I understand that the main complaint (other than the fact that Pearlman aired Payton’s dirty laundry) is that Walter isn’t here to defend himself. Well neither is John Kennedy or Marilyn Monroe. I suspect the difference in our minds between Kennedy and Payton is that Payton was ours. We knew him. He was Chicago. That doesn’t mean, however, that he is above having his story, his whole story told.

Had this been a book about Sammy Sosa with the same allegations, no one would be in an uproar. And it wouldn’t be because Sammy is here to defend himself. The overwhelming feeling would be “I knew Sosa was a jerk, here’s proof.” Payton wasn’t a jerk. He was an amazing athlete with real human flaws. Aside from being the world class athlete, he was no different from any one of us.

Say It Right

Some catch phrases, or shortcuts, in sports - particularly baseball - are annoying. Why do we as a society feel the need to come up with a new phrase and then beat it into the ground until it’s just so many nails on a chalkboard? “Like” sound familiar? “I know, right?” “Really?”

Ryan Dempster takes the bump. “The bump” is just a horrible, lazy phrase. It conjures up nightmarish images thanks to TMZ and tabloid magazines. “Jennifer Garner shows off her baby bump”. That’s a pejorative expression of the miracle of the birth process. But it fits a headline and makes a stupid sound bite. Ryan Dempster is pitching, is on the hill, takes the mound, faces the Reds . . . all good phrases.

Base knock – It’s a base hit folks. Or a single. Or if you want to go Old School, a safety – but let’s not get carried away. Base knock makes no sense.

There is nothing wrong with saying a team’s home town completely. Shortening it to: St. Loo, Beantown, Beer Town (That’s Milwaukee, but St. Louis brews beer and Coors comes from Colorado) is just irritating. I can live with City by the Bay, but other than that, just say the name of the city.

Pop fly – A batter either hits a pop-up or a flyball. If an infielder catches the ball it’s a pop-up. If an outfielder gets it, it’s a flyball. There’s no reason to create a hybrid. I can trace the origin of this phrase to two possible sources, both local. Pat Hughes uses it constantly. That’s probably because he’s stupid. If it was around before Hughes came to Chicago then I blame Shawon Dunston. He would range out into the outfield and take away flyballs from the outfielders. Gary Matthews would have had 200 more putouts in his career if someone else had played shortstop.

Rake – if you’re not intimately involved in the business, don’t use the terminology. It’s like trying to spell something, say “about”, and using the terms Alpha, Bravo, Omega . . if you’re not in the military you just sound stupid. Of course Dave Otto was intimately in the business and he can’t pull it off either. Rake should only be used in the dugout among baseball players.

No-No – It refers to a pitcher throwing a no-hitter. The problem is that it sounds like the announcer is scolding a two year old. “We have a no-no!” Plus the fact there’s no reason to say “no” twice. The No refers to hits. No reason to say no-no. It’s not referring to hits and runs as there have been pitchers in major league history to throw a no-hitter and lose the game because the winning run was score via error, walk, fielder’s choice, sac fly or some combination thereof. Again, like “the bump”, it’s a sophomoric way to express something.

Oh, and one more baseball statement that isn’t a pain, just amazingly accurate. Every team will win 60, every team will lose 60, it’s what you do with the remaining 42 that determines your season. Think about that. Six months of baseball, free agent signings, trades and it all comes down to 42 games. True to form, this season every team in the Major League has lost at least 60 and won at least 60 (save the Houston Astros). The Cubs chose to win just eleven of their 42 games.

Generally Managing An Opportunity

This off-season should be one of the most interesting in recent Cubs history. They are in need of a General Manager and the understanding is that the position will be filled by late October/early November. There are some interesting reports as to the potential candidates for the job. The media has tossed out names like Cashman, Epstein, and Andrew Friedman.

Even the esteemed Buster Olney has claimed the Chicago Cub General Manager position to be the Crown Jewel; the best, most attractive opening in baseball in the last ten years. As an unabashed, lifelong Cubs fan – my Cub flag waving, “Go Cubs Go” Singing, Andre Dawson Salam Genuflecting self has to say “Huh?”

The only upside I see to Cashman or Epstein or any other top GM coming over here is they have a chance to be THE GUY (or in Epstein’s case THE GUY – THE SEQUEL) in baseball history. While that is alluring, it hasn’t been done in 104 years. Hasn’t been done in triple digits. Other than that, at this point, where is the attraction?

You have Soriano ($18 million) on the books until he’s seventy. The Cubs haven’t formally agreed to eat and dispose of Zambrano’s $18 million contract. You have an owner that has said that while he will commit the same amount of operational dollars to the organization, the money will be restructured. So instead of having $140 million go to the major league payroll, they may only spend $110 million on the major league payroll with the extra $30 million being redirected to scouting, farm team development and/or Pacific Rim or Latin America development. All this, by the way, is a really intelligent way to run a business. However if you’re trying to attract a top GM who may not be willing to wait three or four years to see playoff/World Series results, it may be a hard sell. The Cubs are not in a “Win Now” mode.

Additionally, money is going to be spent on Hendry to pay him for next year. Most likely money will be spent on Quade to have him sit around (unless he accepts another position within the organization) AND money will be spent on a new manager, unless for some reason the new GM agrees to keep Quade on for next year while they wait for Zambrano and Ramirez’s contracts to expire and then in 2013 go forward with available money and a new manager. So that’s more dollars that won’t be going to on-the-field payroll.

Add to that a minor league system that sports Brett Jackson and the still young Josh Vitters and that’s about it. This year being a washout we had the opportunity to see what Bryan LaHair, Tony Compana and Tyler Colvin could do, but instead we have a healthy view of the capabilities of the late Kosuke Fukudome, Marlon Byrd and Alfonso Soriano. There are some additional interesting pieces (Matt Szczur, Chris Carpenter, Trey McNutt and Jay Jackson), but not the overwhelming amount of talent that would make a top line GM salivate.

God knows I’ve never run a major league franchise and from looking at the CFCL standings for the past decade, I don’t know how to run a fantasy team either. Aside from the allure of being the guy that puts all the curses to bed and being able to work in the greatest city in the world, I don’t see what makes the Chicago Cubs GM position all that attractive for the proven GMs. That being said, Mr. Ricketts, if you can’t lure Cashman, Epstein, et. al. know that my hat is in the ring. Twenty-eight year General Manager experience; two more championships during that time than the Cubs have managed; an eye for acquiring talented youth (Castro, Heyward, Brown, Stanton) and, yes, I have plenty of experience and talent to make a bad trade (Andrew McCutchen). Call me, Tom. We’ll do lunch.

Can I Get a Little Help?

Chicago needs to improve. There is too much stupidity and entitlement going around.

I'm talking about Lance Briggs. Dude, you signed a six year deal. That means you abide by the terms of the contract for six years. You haven’t outplayed your compensation. When the Bears signed you (after you said you wouldn’t play anymore for the Bears, by the way) they expected you to play to your full capabilities, which with your talent means being an All-Pro. They didn’t sign you with the intention you would be mediocre for six years. If you’re pissed that your contemporaries make more, what did you think? Other NFL players would sign contracts worth less than yours for the next six years?

I’m talking about the idiot media and talking heads of TV and Radio. When it was learned that Ozzie Guillen wanted an extension on his contract, which expires at the end of the 2012 season (oh, by the way, Ozzie? See Lance Briggs.) these media geniuses were saying it made sense because Ozzie is a lame duck. No he isn’t. You’re a lame duck when there is no possible way the term for your position can be extended. Jim Hendry was a lame duck for a month, although only he and Ricketts knew it. George W. Bush and Bill Clinton were lame ducks, essentially once they were re-elected to office, but certainly as they entered the eighth year of their administration. Randy Bush, while not officially since he’s still in the position and could be signed for next year is about as lame a duck as you can be without being one. Ozzie still has a full season and a month on his contract. And if he, Kenny and Jerry could play nice, it’s possible he could have a lifetime contract which means he’s not a lame duck.

I’m talking about Cub Manager Mike Quade. Mike, I was your biggest supporter after the 2010 season before a “new” manager was named (really, check the Monroe Doctrine on September 20, 2010. You were my dark horse favorite). I was in agreement with the Cubs for hiring you for the 2011 and 2012 seasons because, in part, you promised you would hold players accountable and focus on the fundamentals. Well for the 2011 season the fundamentals have sucked and all you’ve done is throw your weight around at Castro, Barney and Colvin. Ramirez loafs his way to first and he keeps getting his name put on the lineup card. Soriano goes after fly balls near the leftfield wall like water goes after oil and he’s in the lineup every day. Either hold players accountable and execute the fundamentals like you promised or move on.

I’m talking about Pat Hughes. He has to go. He has negotiated into his contract that he gets the fifth inning off of every game, including spring training, (as the knowledgeable owner of the DoorMatts quipped “Could you see Vin Scully doing that?”). Additionally he has had at least two scheduled days off this season. The tone in his voice when a game goes extra innings or the temperature is above 89 degrees or below 65 is one of “I can’t believe I have to work in these conditions.” Pat, you work for the Cubs. That means virtually every year you don’t have to work from October 1^st to April 1^st as it is. You get paid to go to spring training to watch baseball – something thousands of Chicagoans do every year, yet they pay for the opportunity. Either commit yourself to the game (not dumbass stories about Gilligan’s Island or what you packed for the road trip) or, preferably, move on.

I’m talking about the Cubs. They need starting pitching. Matt Garza is ok as a #2 or #3. I can live with Wells in the 4^th or 5^th slot. I don’t mind Dempster in 3^rd or 4^th slot. We need two starters. No, we need TWO STARTERS. Andrew Cashner could be one of those guys, but not until at least 2013. He’s been injured all year so you can’t expect him to shoulder much of a load next year (remember Mark Prior in 2003?) Doug Davis, Rodrigo Lopez and Casey Coleman are not options for next year.

I’m talking about the Cubs approach to the second half of the 2011 season. You guys suck this year. You’ll be lucky to finish ahead of the Astros by giving your all. So at the end of the season you will be 25 games out of first, sitting in fourth place and have no idea what Tony Campana can do beside run really fast. No idea if Tyler Colvin is Tyler Colvin 2010, Tyler Colvin 2011 or some variation. You have no idea what Bryan LaHair is besides 28 years old. This team was dead in June and has wasted three months doing nothing besides finally, finally ridding itself of Carlos Zambrano.

Oh, and a General Manger. We need one of those too.

We have a lot of work to do. A lot of changes are coming in the off-season. But as bad as things are here in Chicago, at least we’re not Los Angeles (no NFL franchise, fans literally almost beating another team’s fan to death, bankrupt team, smog and the Real Housewives of Orange County). At least we don’t have that going for us. Which is nice.

On The Road Looking For Sports and Competition

Lady Rebel planned our family vacation (for the third year in a row) during the MLB and CFCL trade deadlines, thereby trying to undermine the efforts of Rebel management to build a championship team. I’m not usually the carpenter blaming the tools, but three years in a row? C’mon. That being said, we were able to experience plenty of examples of sports and competition during our week away.

We stopped for dinner at Cracker Barrel on the way to Florida. We took turns engaging in fierce games of checkers in rocking chairs on their “front porch”. Katelyn couldn’t decide between two items on the menu. I suggested going with the local fare (open faced roast beef with gravy – she loved it). Sadly Indiana is not real friendly whether we were at gas stations or Cracker Barrel.

Because of the strategic timing, the Rebel front office completed their first ever trade via text. While I was driving, I dictated to the Lady Rebel what to text back to the Ruffins to complete the trade. The texts flew back and forth with the Ruffins to finalize Hiroki Kuroda, Eli Whiteside and the Rebels 10^th round pick for Rubby De La Rosa. Word came from Rebels Headquarters that fans were lining up outside Confederate Park awaiting their new cult hero. Rubby is going to sell a lot of jerseys in Fort Payne, Alabama. And immediately following that announcement, the fans with the DeLaRosa jerseys went to Mount Fort Payne Memorial Hospital recovery room to look at Rubby’s new Tommy John surgery scar. Baseball technology gods are not fans of Dem Rebels.

While we were driving through Indiana and Kentucky Sunday night, we listened to Cubs vs. Cardinals on ‘GN. I swear to Hank Aaron I was ready to jump out of the car moving at 70 mph every time I heard Pat Hughes say they were in “St. Loo”. Cubs won every day we were gone. They proceeded to lose the first game we came back into town.

We reached Louisville around 10pm or so which was a real treat. Louisville is a beautiful city, all lit up as you cross the bridge and the Ohio River. Right there is the baseball field for the Louisville Redbirds, also all lit up. Can’t get any better than that.

On our first full day in Florida, we went to Magic Kingdom. While we went on almost every ride and/or attraction, Cooper sadly decided to pick the most boring ride (People Mover in Tomorrowland) as his favorite, wanting to ride it at least five times.

Speaking of competition and sports; I happened to run into Survivor celebrity Russell Hantz (picture above because I'm not technically smart enough to put it here) in Tomorrowland. He has finished second on Survivor two different seasons. The only problem is he is also Kim’s all-time favorite contestant. It was pretty amusing to watch her run to catch up with him to get a picture and shake his hand. Of course, then for the rest of the vacation I had to hear “I can’t believe I met Russell!” All I have to ask is ‘Where the hell was Diane Lane during this week?’

While all this was going on, we missed two Cub wins in Pittsburgh, including Rebel favorite Derrek Lee’s two homeruns and a Cub six homer game. The sacrifices we make for our children.

Two other days we spent at the water park. So Kim and I took turns having races with the girls down the body slides at Typhoon Lagoon. The results were not favorable for the parents.

While we were on the road we also challenged ourselves to see how many different license plates we could tally. Turns out we saw 35 including two Canadian provinces and on plate from Mexico.

Overall it was a good vacation, though I did have people suggest we leave town again until late October to help the Cubs get back in the pennant race. I’ll contribute a week of my life to the cause. The rest is up to Ricketts.

Wrigley Never Felt So Good

Pretty cool experience this past week, even if most of it all took place in my head. I had an appointment to visit with a client. I knew she lived a couple of blocks from Wrigley Field so I decided that if I had time I would have to do a fly-by and check the old girl out (Wrigley, not my client).

I set my GPS for my client’s address and by luck, GPS decided the best way (certainly not the fastest) would be to exit I-90 at Addison. So I’m driving along and when I get on Addison the GPS said “turn left on Sheffield”. My keen baseball acumen kicked in. “Clark/Addison/Sheffield/Waveland”. Addison to Sheffield? I’m going to be turning AT WRIGLEY FIELD!!! No need to work in a fly-by, the satellite gods have programmed it for me!

I’m driving along Addison getting more and more excited in anticipation. All of a sudden, as if out of nowhere, there she is. Tall, beautiful and silent (off day for the Cubs). One second I’m driving past homes on a tree lined street and then all of sudden Wrigley Field – BAM! – appears. Now the memories come flooding back. All the times I took the ‘L’ from Forest Park; all the times I drove down with my family and parked on Irving Park Road (when you could still park on Irving Park Road) or parked in the lot run by the nuns.

Then I’m thinking how special Wrigley Field is and (stupid as it sounds) wanting to get out of the car, touch the walls and tell the passersby “THIS IS WRIGLEY FIELD! Let me tell you how special this place is.” Then it hits me, it’s special to everyone. No one has a unique experience of Wrigley Field and THAT’S what makes it such an amazing place. You saw your first baseball game at Wrigley as a child? I saw my first baseball game at Wrigley as a child. You saw an amazing game at Wrigley? I saw an amazing game at Wrigley. You had a drop-dead gorgeous woman wink at you in the 4^th inning? I had . . . uh, I saw a game at Wrigley. You could go into Murphy’s Bleachers or The Cubby Bear, sit at the bar and strike up a conversation with another Cubs fan and match them story for story about your experiences seeing the Cubs play at Wrigley.

I had to, had to, drive by, not just turning down Sheffield, but circling the park. Driving really slow and having a constant battle at looking at Wrigley, checking my rearview mirror to make sure I wasn’t holding up traffic and checking in front of me to make sure I wasn’t going to run over a pedestrian.

That brings me to something else. I’m driving by, slowly, lovingly and yet I see people walking along the walls of Wrigley, or jogging, or talking on cell phones. It’s all I can do to not jump out of my car and say “DO YOU KNOW WHERE YOU ARE? HOW CAN YOU NOT STOP IN AWE?”

I pulled out my cell phone and snapped shots of the marquee, the statue of Harry, the statue of Billy and the statue of Ernie and if I were more technology astute I would share them with you here. I turned down Waveland and parked next to the gates down the leftfield line so I could get an angled shot of the scoreboard. I’ve done that a few times over the years, not taken a picture but park by the gates and just stare at the scoreboard. I’ve done it in July, I’ve done it in February. Doesn’t matter the time of year, it’s an awesome view.

So I’ve just risked losing my Man Card by admitting that I get emotional driving past a building. But here’s where I regain my Man Card – because I know every one of you have done the same thing.

The (NL) Future's So Bright, We'll Need To Wear Shades

With the arrival of the All-Star Game, we are reminded of the true stars in the league (and the ones that get to attend the game anyway). It also helped crystallize in my mind the up and coming stars.

The National League (we only cover the Major Leagues here at the Monroe Doctrine) has been inundated with the Under 25 Jet Set.

There is A TON of solid young ballplayers that, barring injury or Joe Charboneau-itis, should be in the line-up for years to come.

Jason Heyward (21) – Had a breakout rookie year last year by hitting a homerun on Opening Day and finished the year with 18 homeruns and a .393 OBP. This year he started like last (homerun on Opening Day) but has since struggled with injuries and sophomore adjustments. Still a good, could be great player in the future and more importantly a solid, mature human being.

Starlin Castro (21) – Set a record by driving in six run in his first game ever in the majors. My one complaint isn’t so much about him, can we get Keith Moreland to stop calling him “Starling”? I feel like I listening to the audio track of Silence of the Lambs whenever Moreland talks about him. Castro has huge upside and his power hasn’t even arrived. He needs to mature out in the field and not make pointless throws, but as a fantasy owner, who cares? 2011 All-Star

Buster Posey (24) - No this isn’t the guy who recorded “Hot, Hot, Hot”. It’s the guy who won the National League Rookie of the Year Award last year. 18 homeruns, driving in 67 while playing the toughest, most demanding position in baseball. Oh yeah, he also had to catch the best rotation in baseball, no simple task in general, let alone for a 23 year old at the time. Led the Giants to the World Series where he batted .300. We can only hope that he completely heals from his ankle injury.

Andrew McCutchen (24) – Ahh, Andrew. My personal favorite. Gold Glove potential in centerfield. Offensively can hit for average, power and runs like the wind. He’s been moved all over the lineup; leading off, batting third, batting cleanup. Solid .365 OBP his first two years and all he does is improve his homerun, steals, RBIs and run numbers each of his first three years in the league. More importantly, he has his team challenging for a Division title well into July. Something that hasn’t happened in Pittsburgh since 1992. Probably the best player the Pirates have seen since Clemente. 2011 All-Star

Mike Stanton (21) – A mountain of a man. More power than a semi on supercharged diesel. Is among the league leaders in homeruns – he’s 21 folks – and he missed part of the year with eye issues. Strikes out way too much, but the raw power and talent he possesses could make Florida happy for years to come.

Jair Jurrjens(25) – Another in a long line of solid Atlanta pitchers, and arrived in Braves attire by way of Detroit, not unlike John Smoltz. Five years into his career he’s already nineteen games over .500. With pitchers there’s always the question of when they’ll break down. He missed some time last year, but has rebounded to have an incredible start to the 2011 season. 2011 All-Star.

Carlos Gonzalez (25) – Had a breakout year last year fighting Pujols and Votto to the very end for MVP. He’s having another solid year this year, though not at the same pace as his MVP worthy year last year. Still, he’s putting up solid OBP numbers as well as another 20/20 season.

Drew Storen (23) – The less heralded Washington National pitcher that debuted in 2010. He’s quietly collected 28 saves in 98 games while posting a WHIP under 1.00 and a K/BB ratio of amost 3.00 this year.

This list isn’t meant to be comprehensive and admittedly it doesn’t even include Stephen Strasburg (22). Freddie Freeman (21) or Bryce Harper (18) due to such a small, or non-existant, sample size.

There’s always the next “player of the century” but in this case, it looks like the National League has a lot of young talent with staying power.