Draft Day - A Rebroadcast

Draft Day – A Rebroadcast

Another successful CFCL Draft was completed on (no joke) April 1st 2007. In a short seven hours and 34 minutes (not counting time for potty breaks) 140 players were acquired Auction style. Here are some of the highlights. Almost all of them are true.

11:45pm (Saturday) – Rebels go to sleep with the sudden realization they have no idea who they need to draft and what it will take to build a championship team. At least there’s hope for election to the Executive Committee.

7:45 Draft Day starts with rules conversation and player movement.

7:56 Da Paul Meisters arrive

7:57 EC Election of Dave Mahlan, Dave Holian, Rich Bentel – the Maniacal Triumvirate is in place. Eric Lamb loses a close election by making the fatal error of not bringing the Krispy Kremes.

7:59 Dave Mahlan brags about his tripod and The Professor notices how nice the Head Rebel smells, not that there’s anything wrong with that.

8:02 Ruffins start the race by bidding on Rollins; Lambchops surprise all by outbidding Stones at .38

8:18 First request of “What’s the Bid” goes to Matt Grage on Jason Bay

8:23 First “Asleep at the Wheel” instance, the Stones on Andruw Jones

8:27 An owner notices Kenn standing and hopping up and down and inquires if Kenn has to use the washroom. Kenn reports that he’s had too much caffeine and can’t sit still. This bodes well for the rest of the draft.

8:36 Steve admits his plan - “Not to blink”

8:47 Stones spend more on the last two players (Delgado .41 and Oswalt .43) than the DoorMatts had available for their whole team

9:27 Teddy bids .12 (and acquires much to his dismay) the “Light Sabre Dude”

9:31 Round 2 Ends

9:35 For what will be the first of many, an owner is heard on the cell phone telling his GM “I love you”.

10:07 DoorMatts join the party in Round 3 by acquiring John Smoltz. They cringe at the realization they could have had two hours more sleep!!

10:14 Rebels make mistake of mentioning “squishy balls” a theme that will run throughout the rest of the draft.

10:24 Lambchops are the first team to be knocked out of bidding due to not enough money (Pat Burrell).

10:36 Rebels make critical error by spending .09 more than their entire budget on catchers for Chris Iannetta (.16).

11:09 Round 4 Ends

11:54 Red Hots exercise the first Home Town Discount of the day (L. Gonzalez for .05)

12 BELLS as we enter Round 6 with the opening bid of .01 on Kelly Johnson

1:17 Rebels ground into a mass of uncertainty playing the HTD game against Bob for Adam Everett. The Red Hots leap through the Door of Opportunity opened by Bentel and snag Everett for .03.

1:21 Teddy takes a shot at Kenn claiming that Kenn is five years old because he wants Matt G. to wear his fire hat next year.

1:23 First .01 player acquired by Red Hots (Alex Gonzalez)

1:42 Graging Bulls are the first team completing their draft by acquiring Craig Counsell. Little do they know that they have another two hours to wait before they can acquire their next player in the Rotation Draft.

2:41 Bentel makes the room laugh by saying that with Kenn and Nick trying to bounce the rubbers balls in distracted unison, they are an ugly version of Blue Man Group.

2:47 CFCL goes down the dark path of drugs bidding on Josh Hamilton

3:14 Nick (the Nebraska-look-a-like of Josh Groban) notices that “Christ”, brought up by the Rebels, is good for getting a bunch of saves. In actuality the Rebels were MASSIVELY frustrated at having to settle for Ausmus as their last roster spot.

3:27 With a flurry, the Lambchops, Meisters and Copperfields wrap up their drafting back to back to back.

3:36 CFCL DRAFT DAY 2007 ends with the Red Hots selecting Brad Thompson for .01

3:45 Kenn goes on line to see if perhaps TWA has a later flight out of O’Hare to the Queen City. He doesn’t seem phased by the fact that TWA stopped flying planes 15 years ago.

4:07 While waiting for the Copperfields to select their next player in the rotation round, The Professor quietly practices a few phrases to use while ordering wine from the peasants during his summer sabbatical at his villa in Italy.

4:48 Having failed to get Neil Cotts, Stones select Robbie Hammock

5:33 The final player is selected and a general sigh of relief is exhaled. Handshakes and well wishes are exchanged. On the commute home, each owner mentally analyzes their performance in the draft and secretly wishes they had a couple of do-overs. Only time will tell if Teddy stole the show with De Aza or if he created the sequel to the “Ramon Martinez Incident” [see CFCL Draft History 1992]. De Aza is officially the new currency of the CFCL, as in “I had to pay three De Aza’s at the toll booth; this promises to be much more enjoyable than what Orestes Destrada did to the CFCL minted greens [see CFCL Draft History 1993].